chapter 16 - a snow rabbit

happy new year everyone!!

Zhuang Yan wasn’t dressed formally. He’d just put on a casual sweater, and the collar of his shirt inside was peeking out of the neckline. He looked free and unrestrained, and pleasing to the eye.

Some good-looking people were good-looking without any flaws. Whether it’s a suit and vest, or a sweater and shirt, nothing could hide or cover the masculine, mature aura.

When he smiled, the corners of his lips lifted a little, and his eyebrows softened a bit, making it hard for others to look away.

In the words of fangirls on the Internet, his smile could make a person crumble.

Xie Ning moved his eyes away from that eye-catching face, and stared instead at the snow on Zhuang Yan’s shoulders. “W-Why are you here?”

“Making you a snowman--no, snow rabbit.” Zhuang Yan shrugged, saying, “How is it, oh famous artist, is it pleasing to your eyes?”

He didn’t know how long it took Zhuang Yan to make this snow rabbit. The hands were made from folding a branch into two and sticking it on, the nose was a carrot, and, who knows where he found it, the ears were made from two long, green leaves, drooping and stooped.

The colors were plentiful, and full of creativity. Even though it couldn’t be called exquisite or beautiful, it did give off quite a happy feeling.

Xie Ning didn’t know why, but he was moved by this happy, silly looking snow rabbit.

He blinked, saying, “I like it very much.”

Then sniffed and said, “Thank you.”

Zhuang Yan chuckled, saying, “You’re so moved that you’re going to cry?”

Xie Ning whispered, “I’m not crying.”

Zhuang Yan raised his eyebrow, and pulled Xie Ning to his side. “The corners of your eyes are so red already, yet you’re going to deny it in front of me?”

How could that be?

Xie Ning touched the corner of his eye subconsciously, and felt around for a while, but couldn’t feel anything.

But Zhuang Yan was so amused by this action of his that he laughed.

Xie Ning continued to insist, “It’s red because it’s cold.”

“Alright,” Zhuang Yan said, his face full of pleasure. “If you say it’s red because it’s cold, then it’s red because it’s cold.”

After all this, Xie Ning had already been lifted out of the depressive mood he was in earlier. He looked at Zhuang Yan, and said, “You’re tricking me again, aren’t you? The corners of my eyes aren’t red at all, are they?”

Zhuang Yan was overjoyed. “You finally realized?”

Xie Ning glared at him with puffed up cheeks.

Zhuang Yan sighed. “The corners of your eyes aren’t red, but when you got out of the car, it looked like you were going to cry.”

Xie Ning was a little startled.

Zhuang Yan lowered his voice. “I just comforted you two days ago, so what made you unhappy again this time?”

Xie Ning shook his head. “I’m not unhappy.”

Zhuang Yan let out a small laugh, as if he was laughing at how Xie Ning was denying it and not wanting to tell the truth.

He put his hand on Xie Ning’s shoulder, and, noticing how Xie Ning wasn’t resisting, pulled him a little closer. “Tell me, who’s making my Mr. Rabbit sad again?”

Zhuang Yan was too close to him, as if he wanted to hug him, but he persistently kept a little distance between them.

Take one step closer, and Xie Ning could hug him.

Take one step back, and the ambiguity would disappear.

He didn’t use cologne today, and the smell of his body was very clean and refreshing, just like snow.

Xie Ning caught a whiff of that smell, and his mind suddenly went blank.

He couldn’t remember anything right now, and even forgot to refute that “my Mr. Rabbit” that Zhuang Yan called him. He only widened his eyes, staring at Zhuang Yan blankly.

Xie Ning’s personality was cold and restrained. He didn’t like to interact with others, was not very close to his family members, his ex-boyfriend existed but didn’t do anything, and he only had one good friend, Yan Xi.

Yan Xi had a carefree personality and irritable temper, and sometimes was unable to see the changes in Xie Ning’s mood.

Zhuang Yan was the first person to understand his mood at a glance and to try to make him happy.

This feeling was so unfamiliar, and Xie Ning was unsure how to deal with it on the spot.

After several seconds, Xie Ning reached his hand out, and tugged at the hem of Zhuang Yan’s shirt. “Mr. Blue Whale.”

Zhuang Yan, with a lowered voice, said, “Hmm?”

Xie Ning put his head on Zhuang Yan’s neck, and fell into his arms. “Let me hug you for a while.”

A chuckle came from above his head. “I’m right here, and I won’t go. You can hug me for however long you’d like.”

Xie Ning closed his eyes, and on this snowy day, felt an unprecedented warmth.

After a long while, Xie Ning slowly came back to his senses.

He blushed afterwards, stepping out of Zhuang Yan’s embrace, and moved his gaze to the side.

One could tell he was embarrassed at a glance.

Zhuang Yan was in an astronomically good mood, and looked at Xie Ning with a barely-contained smile. “You’re not going to hug me for longer?”

Xie Ning’s ears were so red that it gave him away immediately. He shook his head and said, “N-no.”

The snow rabbit was quietly gazing at them from the side. Xie Ning only now saw that its eyes were two dark pebbles, giving him the wrong impression that they were gems.

Zhuang Yan followed his gaze to the rabbit, and stroked his chin. “You and this rabbit really do look similar.”

Xie Ning’s eyes widened. “Where are we similar?”

Zhuang Yan, acting all solemn and deep in thought, said, “You’re both so pale, so cute, so eye-catching. Oh, and when you’re happy, your ears are just like it, drooping and wilted.”

Xie Ning gave him a quick glance. “I’m not!”

Zhuang Yan continued, “Even the way you stare is the same.”

Xie Ning didn’t even dare to glare at Zhuang Yan anymore. Zhuang Yan didn’t want to let him go yet.

“But there are some dissimilarities…” Zhuang Yan dragged out his words. “You look much better than he does when you’re shy.”

“...”

Xie Ning...Xie Ning had absolutely no idea what he should say.

Zhuang Yan stared at him for a while, and his heart rippled, as if there was a bottle of water swinging slowly in his heart.

Xie Ning was too cute and innocent like this.

He couldn’t help but want to smoke a cigarette to suppress the bestial thoughts that were at the bottom of his heart.

“It’s too cold outside,” Xie Ning looked at him left and right, and diverted the topic. “It’s still snowing, so let’s go inside and talk.”

Zhuang Yan smiled, saying, “It is quite cold.”

As he said this, he took off his own scarf and wrapped it around the snow rabbit, and said, “Mr. Rabbit can’t follow us in, so I’m afraid he’s going to be frozen solid.”

Xie Ning: “...”

Is he sick in the head?

He couldn’t help it, and cursed once in his heart.

But he also felt like he had been wrapped warmly in a scarf.

Zhuang Yan was about to leave, but Xie Ning pulled him to a stop. “Wait.”

“What’s the matter?” Zhuang Yan turned back to look at him.

Xie Ning stepped forward, reached his hand out and patted Zhuang Yan’s shoulders, pushing the snow off. He then tiptoed up to pat away the snow on his head, too. “How long have you been outside for? You’re covered in snow, and you look like a snowman from far away.”

Zhuang Yan smiled slightly. “I did stay outside for quite a while. It wasn’t easy to make that snow rabbit, since I had to pile it up little by little. Nobody else helped me.”

Xie Ning: “Why did you make a snow rabbit?”

Zhuang Yan reached his hand out to pull him. Xie Ning was startled by the coldness that touched him, but he didn’t struggle this time.

Zhuang Yan’s lips curled upwards. “Didn’t you draw a blue whale for me? I wanted to give you a rabbit in return.”

Xie Ning made an “Ah” sound, and said, “That...was something I drew randomly.”

Zhuang Yan didn’t care, saying, “I also made this rabbit randomly.”

The two of them entered the house as they were talking.

After he turned on the light, Xie Ning looked down immediately at Zhuang Yan’s hands.

Sure enough, because they’d grabbed too much snow, his hands were thoroughly red.

Zhuang Yan finally threw away his idol image, and said, “I’m frozen to death.”

Xie Ning glanced at him, his heart a little troubled, and tap tap tap ran to the kitchen to pour him a cup of warm milk.

Even if Zhuang Yan didn’t like to drink milk, at least he could warm his hands up.

Xie Ning completely didn’t realize that Zhuang Yan had no excuse to come for meals anymore, but still “walked through the hall and entered the inner room”, entering his home.

He’d calmed down now, and the depressed mood he was in after coming back from Elder Xie’s place was completely gone. Seeing Zhuang Yan leaning on the sofa, he was at a loss.

What if Zhuang Yan asked him why he was unhappy again?

Xie Ning pressed his lips together.

Zhuang Yan saw the distress in his eyes, and, showing every consideration, said, “You don’t need to worry about me. If you need to go do something, go ahead. I’ll just warm my hands here.”

Xie Ning hesitated for a moment, and asked, “Do...you want to watch me draw?”

Zhuang Yan lifted his eyebrow. “You’re going to draw?”

“Mmn.” Xie Ning responded, and hesitated again. “I still haven’t drawn the scene from <The Monologue> I promised you before.”

Zhuang Yan looked as if he had just remembered this. “If you didn’t mention it, I would have forgotten.”

The heat on Xie Ning’s face had almost gone away, and he watched Zhuang Yan’s eyes sparkle. “The scene where the protagonist was chased out of the theater is very important to the plot. I’m afraid I won’t be able to draw it well.”

Zhuang Yan rubbed Xie Ning’s hair and smiled, saying, “Teacher XN is amazing. How could he not draw it well?”

Xie Ning was used to being praised a lot, and normally didn’t think anything of it, but with Zhuang Yan’s simple sentence, his face flushed with embarrassment.

Since Zhuang Yan’s standards were higher than the sky, and his assessment of most things were harsh and critical, it was very rare to hear him praise others.

Zhuang Yan had already been in Xie Ning’s art studio before, and he familiarly moved a small stool over to the side so that he could watch Xie Ning draw.

When he was on QiuMing Lake’s bank, Xie Ning was only sketching. This time, he was using his tablet, so his drawing techniques and styles were completely different.

The draft had been prepared a long time ago. Zhuang Yan typically communicated often with the art team on his crew, but this time, he could appreciate the process with no stress.

He watched for a while, and his eyes involuntarily moved to the side to watch Xie Ning’s face instead.

Xie Ning lowered his head when drawing, with a focused and serious expression. His eyes seemed to hide thousands of galaxies, so bright that it almost burned.

An unknown person once said this: Men who are focused when working are the most sensual.

Zhuang Yan stared at Xie Ning for a long time, and felt Xie Ning picked him up successfully.

Xie Ning was afraid that he would be bored, sitting on the side, so he drew and chatted with Zhuang Yan about <The Monologue> at the same time.

“A long lens was used for this scene in the movie, so I think the director wanted to emphasize the truth.”

The long lens captured the lakeside scenery vibrantly and clearly. The shimmering lake, the tree branches waving in the slight wind, and the varying pedestrians that walked past the lake…

The protagonist dragged his broken leg behind him and limped past the lake.

But nobody noticed the spiritless theater actor.

Zhuang Yan put his elbow on the table, chose an angle, and put his chin on his upright hand. “<The Monologue>’s protagonist is a theater actor with mythomania. He’s under the illusion that he’s a great, highly anticipated protagonist, but in reality, he’s only able to play small roles that nobody pays attention to.”

Xie Ning and Zhuang Yan had the same understanding. “He can’t distinguish between imagination and reality or on stage and off stage. Most of the audience wasn’t able to distinguish them either, and many of them didn’t even realize that the ‘past’ the protagonist had recalled was mostly the plays he’d acted in before, not his actual life.”

Chatting with a like-minded person was so enjoyable. If you say one sentence, they would immediately be able to say the next sentence that you were thinking of.

Zhuang Yan agreed with Xie Ning’s initial view. “So I...the director specifically used the long lens here to tell the audience that this downcast protagonist, that nobody is looking at, is the truth.”

Truth is the key to this scene.

When drawing this scene, Xie Ning didn’t use bold colors to complement, or dark colors to contrast.

The former was too dramatic and fantastic, while the latter was too fuzzy and blurred.

Xie Ning used dusk hues.

It’s a warm color, but carries a sense of desolation and loneliness.

It was exactly what Zhuang Yan had envisioned.

Zhuang Yan lowered his eyes and swept them over the entire drawing. Xie Ning did not exactly copy the scene from the movie, but made some changes based on his own understanding.

Every change he made seemed to teeter on the cusp of Zhuang Yan’s heart, making him think, Yes, that’s what I wanted to express.

Suddenly, an idea came to his mind.

If he invited Xie Ning to participate in the art design of his new film, would it help him hit it off and create sparks in his heart?

This thought, as soon as it appeared, gripped his heart like it wouldn’t let go.

Xie Ning is an original artist. He’d only worked on games in the past, but...Zhuang Yan trusted in his talent and strength.

He believed even more in their close connection and compatibility. Xie Ning could definitely draw the essence of what Zhuang Yan wanted.

As for Xie Ning’s lack of experience and practice in the field of film and television art, it’s okay. Zhuang Yan could slowly guide and teach him.

Zhuang Yan gave himself a like in his heart. He thought this idea was completely genius and perfect.

But, would Xie Ning agree to it?

He didn’t seem to need money or fame.

Zhuang Yan stroked his chin, thinking about how to spirit Xie Ning away.

Xie Ning turned his head at this moment to glance at him. “Many of Zhuang Yan’s movies are very interesting. I particularly like how he uses pictures in his movies. Sometimes there’s no need for lines, or even characters--he can use only a picture to describe his thoughts and meaning.”

Hearing his own name so suddenly, Zhuang Yan was startled for a moment.

He recalled for a second and realized that he had never told Xie Ning that he is Zhuang Yan.

They had only met for such a short amount of time, yet they had developed a deep friendship, and over time, even forgotten that they hadn’t told each other their names yet.

But it’s not that important.

Names are just a title, Zhuang Yan thought.

Plus, he was able to hear Xie NIng’s evaluation of him from a third person perspective, especially his praise.

Zhuang Yan felt refreshed all over, as if he was floating in the air.

Speaking of which...Xie Ning seemed to have always liked his movies.

If he used the name Zhuang Yan to invite him, Xie Ning shouldn’t refuse, right?

His heart was about to do something troublesome, and he couldn’t help but call out to Xie Ning.

“What’s the matter?” Xie Ning’s head was lowered, and he picked up his tablet pen to continue drawing, and casually responded to Zhuang Yan. “Is it boring to watch?”

Zhuang Yan shook his head. “I suddenly remembered that there was something I forgot to tell you this whole time, but I didn’t hide it from you on purpose.”

Xie Ning wasn’t too bothered by this. “What is it?”

Zhuang Yan became nervous for some reason. “Actually, I’m…”

He was still talking when the phone rang and interrupted him.

Xie Ning subconsciously turned towards the sound of the ringtone. It was Zhuang Yan’s phone.

Caller ID: Zhao Yang

Zhuang Yan picked up the phone with no expression and a gloomy tone, slightly revealing how he was upset that he and Xie Ning’s world was being disturbed.

“You’d better pray that you have something important to tell me since you called me at this time.”

----------------------------------------------

Author’s Note: I was afraid that you guys thought his identity was going to be revealed, so I added an extra part at the end.

Congratulations to NingNing for missing the opportunity to find out Mr. Blue Whale’s identity X2

When writing this chapter, I was also moved by ZhuangZhuang. How could he be so~~ warm!